tea is leaf water, coffee is bean water, soda is sugar water, people are blood water, everything is just fucking water
when i was in year 5, i did a speech on clumsiness for my school’s public speaking contest and to be clever, i tripped on my way to the stage dropping my note cards all over the place, but then i pulled the real ones out of my pocket saying ‘if you’re going to be clumsy, it pays to be prepared!’
everyone lost their shit and i got second place
If you got second place who got first… Did they talk about fire safety and burn the stage down or something
Today I burned my tongue on a piece of pizza and I think that it’s a very strong metaphor that sometimes the things you love most in life will hurt you.
i still don’t understand the whole “fake geek girl” thing like????
oh, you caught me dude, I stayed up till 6am reading a 50,000 word fic about tony stark and steve rogers having butt sex just to impress you